Jill colemanAs many of you might know from the recent blog posts I wrote over the past three days, I have been at the Time Millionaires Retreat 2013 in Asheville, NC.  Let me just start with saying, Asheville is amazing and if you are ever in NC you have to go there.  Next let me say that I am so excited and grateful to be part of the Time Millionaires Retreat and Jill Coleman’s, coaching group.  It has been an amazing experience and because of this I wanted to make sure I shared the most important message that I got from the whole conference and it came from my coach Jill Coleman.  What Jill had to say reminded me of what happened to me when I was a little girl.

Growing up I remember learning that it was okay to be myself and that I should express myself.  Something I value now because I know that not everyone has grown up this way.  However that belief was smashed one day when I spoke my mind to my father, I will never forget the words he said to me.  It was a difficult time, my parents where splitting up and I was Daddy’s Little Girl.  I felt like my dad wasn’t just breaking up with my mom, he was breaking up with me too.  Slowly after this event, I found myself being afraid to speak my mind in certain situations, especially in close personal relationships.  I was so scared that if I was myself or said what I really thought or wanted, I would be abandoned again.  I wonder if you can relate?

beyouLearning how to speak up for myself and speak for myself has been a road that I have long traveled.  There were times when I struggled and I almost lost who I was.  Now I work very hard on embracing myself and telling people what I need.  This is still uncomfortable at times.  Jill hit home with this statement – Be 100% unapologetically you.

I firmly believe that it is important to be yourself, although this may not always be seen as proper it is important for your health and stress level.  When we compromise who we are, what we think and how we feel because of someone else, we are doing a disservice to them as well as to ourselves.  They don’t get to know who we really are and therefore we may not be in the best relationships.  When we can freely be ourselves we feel more comfortable, confident and happy.  We are not scared that someone will leave us and we feel accepted by those who are in relationships with us.  Plus it is so freaking hard to be someone else, so just be yourself and don’t apologize for it.  This doesn’t mean you are rude or nasty to people, but it does mean that you be you without worrying about whether other people will like you.  The important ones will continue to love you.  You will also draw in the right type of friends to you, while letting go of the ones that don’t get you.  Being yourself is the easiest and the hardest thing you will do but it is also the most rewarding.

Embrace who you are all your quirks and don’t be afraid to express yourself.  Your friends and family will love you and if they don’t “Fuck’em because they weren’t very good for you anyways.

#beyourself <3 Amanda

Comment below with you thoughts about embracing and expressing yourself 🙂 I would love to here your struggles and successes.